Behind the scenes with Marisa

I never considered myself a networker or anyone who can "work a room". In fact, to this day I refer to myself as an extroverted introvert when it comes to networking in general.

Despite this I was somehow always really good at "picking up" really great connections. When I was still working in corporate, from one single networking event I attended, I met someone who not only referred me on for an global executive position (which I landed), but also for another one again, years later.  Now I take full credit for getting those senior-level roles, but by dropping my name, he made the opportunity possible for me to walk through the door. This is just one of many connections who have helped me grow.

Still, I used to think I was just a lucky "networker" who was fortunate to bump into people who could help me. Until one day someone told me why they remembered me after that first meet-and-greet at a large conference we attended. She said: "Marisa, you make people feel good." I didn't understand what that meant at the time until I began my work here at In Our Shoes when I had to look back at everything I did that worked on the networking front. What she meant was, that I naturally found one thing about a stranger I met and would comment on it in a positive way. It could be a piece of jewelry they were wearing or a handbag. If I like something, I tend to talk about it. Even after hearing a speaker, I would go up to them after the event and let them know how much I enjoyed hearing them or follow up with a thank you e-mail, even though I was just a little dot in a very big audience they would never remember me from. I gave away compliments that made people shine without even realizing it. People didn't necessarily remember me per se, or what I looked like. They remembered how they felt around me which kept me memorable. That's how it works. I've always enjoyed when someone observed a little special something on me and subconsciously gave that same energy out to others.

So think about ways in which you are memorable in your personal life where you feel safe and apply that to the public world as if you know everyone in the room. Be open. Talk to strangers whom you for no rational reason just tend to gravitate to. Even when you sit at a table with strangers, that seat you chose wasn't random. Someone at the that table can help you. You were paired there for a reason - both of you.  This isn't magic, it's simply how we are given opportunities. They are right beneath our nose. So, when your gut says to go up to a stranger and ask them a question - do it! Don't question WHY. That's an inspired action and will unveil itself later.